Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Randomize
