when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
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