So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
Randomize
