is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
Randomize
