butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
Randomize