Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
Just got a message on OkCupid from a 20-year-old who has "Momma's Boy" tattoed across his chest and thinks the earth is bigger than the sun.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
Randomize