you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
I touched a dick in church today
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Randomize
