Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Randomize
