Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
Randomize
