you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Randomize
