Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
Top reasons to NOT leave jessica to her own devices : 1. Drinking becomes a competitive sport ( in which she is the only one competing) 2.big girl words= no worky 3. Whiskey refuses to be a good friend (as much as she insists ). 4. Waking up at six a.m. still in her swim suit is super awkward. 5. It isn't a fun game to figure out which person she gave her number to and 6. Yesterdays eyeliner doesn't look good today.
He broke up with his gf yesterday so he could give me our annual Christmas sex at midnight.
Marry him. Now.
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
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