Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
Randomize