He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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