Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
Woke up with a retainer in my boxers and about ten chicks passed out around me. now I feel like something out of Cinderella, trying to find whose teeth fit in the glass retainer.
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
You're like the curious george of whores
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
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