Welp...herpes.
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
Randomize
