I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
Randomize
