No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
Randomize
