She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
Randomize
