Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
Randomize
