i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
You might not want to come home tonight. Mom just found your vibrator and now she won't stop sobbing and holding a framed picture of you as a little kid.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
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