Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
i'm watching a show about a girl who died from masterbating with a carrot. A FUCKING CARROT, EMILY! YOU NEED TO BE CAREFUL!
My underwear smells like fireworks.
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize
