I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me...
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
Randomize
