But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
I think I sprained my soul last night
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
Randomize
