I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
I think I have vodka in my lungs
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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