There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
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