I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
Randomize
