is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
my phone is just a graveyard for last nights mistakes. at least it's giving me hints as to where i was though, i'm like carmen sandiego
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
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