If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
Why is the turtle in the toilet again?
Well as I was puking in the tub I put him in there to keep me company but I am almost positive the original setup was him in the tub and me next to the toilet...I hope he likes tequila
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