His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
Randomize
