Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
Randomize
