# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER.
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
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