This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
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