It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
i wonder why nobody wants to date me...im doing a crossword at work and asked out loud: whats a 4 letter word for 'a reason to get married?'
i was like PREG?
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
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