woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
Randomize