Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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