People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
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