So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
your like the ambassador to my penis.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
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