I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
The adults are the big ones right?
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
Randomize
