this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
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