so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
the cashier at riteaid just made the sign of the cross before he rang up my pregnancy test. now i know god is on my side
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Randomize