They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
Randomize
