Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
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