you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
Randomize