I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
Send help, water and tortillas.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
Randomize
