Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
Randomize
