last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
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