Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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