Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
Randomize
