I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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