we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
Randomize
