EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
Randomize
